Hello my friend,
Welcome back.
There is a problem with confidence.
We are often told to ‘be confident’ when facing a challenge.
Be it public speaking, an interview, moving countries, changing jobs.
When making a change, a big decision or when chasing a goal.
The message is ‘have confidence’.
But this can be misleading.
It can create the impression that not feeling confident means something is wrong.
Or that feeling nervous is a sign we aren’t ready or cut out for it.
An indication that we aren’t prepared or we aren’t the right person for it.
But feeling doubt or nervous in situations of any significance is perfectly normal.
In fact it helps us significantly.
It shows that we care.
It makes us focus, to prepare and to perform better.
It keeps us learning.
The biggest problem is that when we don't feel confident we don’t move.
It stops us from starting. We wait to feel ready. To feel confident first.
We believe that the lack of it is signal that we're not ready or capable.
But that's not true.
Action precedes confidence.
The most accomplished people understand this.
They move and take action despite not feeling ready.
Despite the fear and nerves.
Despite when not feeling confident.
This is true of high performers across any domain.
They don't wait for the answers, they trust those will come down the line.
They don’t wait for the confidence, they trust it will find them.
Through taking steps and action we start to present ourselves with evidence.
Not that we are fearless but that we’re the type of person who takes action regardless of how we feel.
This is what earns confidence over time.
What will make us grow and achieve more.
Confidence finds us when it’s ready.
But not if we sit around and wait for it.
Working with me
Alongside online health coaching I run training with businesses and professionals looking to enhance their confidence and ability when public speaking. Check out my latest offering click here to see it and contact me to book.
For all coaching enquiries contact me here
What I’m learning
Positive vs negative feedback.
In a study on pro rugby players, athletes watched a pre-game video with their coach.
Sometimes the coach highlighted mistakes and things to worry about.
Other times, he focused on past successes and strengths.
The difference?
Positive feedback boosted testosterone by nearly 15% - and kept cortisol stable.
Negative feedback? Flat testosterone. Cortisol up nearly 20%.
Performance matched the biology. - Steve Magness
A drug for better performance.
“Fear is nothing to be afraid of. Fear is a performance-enhancing drug.” - Jimmy Carr
No-one is watching.
“There is nothing more liberating than realising how indifferent the rest if the world is to what you’re doing.” - Chris Williamson
Question
What is the advice your younger self would have given you right now?
What is the advice your future self would give you right now?
That’s all for this week, thank you for reading!
With love, Nick x
p.s. if you’re in madrid come and join us at Running Minds. Read more here!